Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Asshat, Aisle 10

Today I decided to go to Target on my lunch break. As I started to climb down the flights of stairs in my office building, I tripped over a step. Luckily I grabbed hold of the rail and instead of falling down the remaining stairs, my body slammed into the railing, banging my right knee. I should have taken that as a sign to turn around and head back to the safety of my office.

As I got into my car, I slammed my right knee into the lower part of my dashboard. Again, another sign that I ignored.

Strolling around Target, a customer came up to me and asked where something was. I looked at her, puzzled, and decided that I will NEVER wear a red shirt to Target again.

When I was done, I waited in line for the express lanes. The people waiting had created one line to wait for all four express lane registers. I was probably the third person in line when this guy comes up, starts to wait right next to a register, but then is told by the customers in front of me that they're in line. So he comes and waits in line right next to the woman in front of me, apparently not seeing (or ignoring) me. So when I go up to go to a register, he screams, "NO! I'm in line! You're behind me!" I tried to argue reasonably with him, "Actually, no. I was in line when you came up to get in line. I was right behind her." "NO!," he screamed. So, I reluctantly got behind him, all the while he's cursing under his breath. The guy behind him, who came up after all this happened, says to me, "Oh, I guess I'll let you get in front of me." And I try to convince him, "Actually, I really was here before him....and you." I was done at the register before the mean guy was and I was pulling out of the parking lot as he was walking out of the store. He crossed in front of my car and I revved my engine while in neutral. He knew I was pissed. Asshat!

For whatever reasons (::cough:: and maybe hormones ::cough::), everything I described above was too much - I just lost it. Before returning to my office, I sat in my car and cried. I kept telling myself, "It's no big deal! That guy was just an ass! You're just having a bad moment." I pulled myself together and went back to work. Thankfully I got to vent to my co-workers, who had their own Target horror stories, including one about a guy vomiting profusely in the middle of the cash registers. Hey! Maybe it was the guy who was rude to me! He suffers from a rare condition of Asshat-at-Target-itis!

My day got better, though, when I went for my first training session at the gym tonight. The trainer was very, very impressed when I told him my success thus far. I had done a half-hour of cardio on the eliptical before my training session, so he was especially impressed with my cardio as I kept up with the squats, lunges, squats, leg press, squats, leg extensions, squats, leg abduction, squats... Did I mention squats? I signed up for six more training sessions to put the icing on the cake between now and my wedding. I need to be properly armed. Get it? ::taps mic:: Is this thing on?

"Doesn't matter how well prepped you are or how well armed you are, you're a little girl." - Buffy, Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Monday, February 27, 2006

Bad Blogging Bride

If ya haven't noticed, I'm having a bit of a blogger writing block. At the moment, I'm pretty much consumed with finalizing wedding details. I try to keep my wedding-related blogging to a minimum, but as that's all I seem to be doing, thinking, pondering and experiencing these days, it's also the only thing that's remotely blog-worthy.

This was probably the most stressful wedding-related weekend yet. I can only hope that the next 39 days won't get too nuts. (I know, I know - that's just crazy talk!)

First, my future in-laws decided to butt heads with us about our honeymoon registry. All I'm gonna say is that Brent and I pacified them by taking it off our wedding website, but he and I were really upset by their approach to the situation.

Second, I took my wedding dress in for alterations and they quoted me a price for alterations that's not that much less than what I paid for my dress! I have some calls and e-mails out to get estimates from other tailors, but I do need extensive work done because my dress is at least two sizes too big and may end up having to pay the high costs. Apparently weight loss has its drawbacks.

Third, I was working on our wedding program and came across this poem.

Lovingly Remembered, Sadly Missed…

If Roses Grow in Heaven
Lord please pick a bunch for me
Place them in my Father's arms
And tell him they're from me.

Tell him I love him and miss him,
And when he turns to smile,
Place a kiss upon his cheek
And hold him for awhile.

Because remembering him is easy,
I do it every day,
But there's an ache within my heart
Because I'm missing him today.

I'm not religious and am not going to use this in the program as I've had to carefully choose how I can honor my deceased father without putting a damper on a celebratory day. Having said that, coming across the beautiful poem jarred me a bit and reminded me how our big day won't be the same without him there.

On the lighter side of wedding plans, we saw our centerpiece sample on Sunday and it was absolutely stunning - better than I had imagined! We also figured out what we're doing for table numbers, although now my plans for placecards aren't going to work. We're also working on our vows.

And my mother? Oh, my mother. She's probably the most clueless mother of the bride ever, but I wouldn't have it any other way. I've had to call her so many times to remind her to book a hotel room for her trip to LA this weekend as well as the room for the nights around my wedding. And I asked her if she knew where we were registered. Her response? "Um, Target?" Actually, as much as I love Target, we didn't register there. (I've heard so many horror stories about their registry.) "Uh, Bed Bath & Beyond?" Yup. I also added Crate and Barrel. "We don't have those here!" (in my hometown). "People can order online," I reminded her. "Ohhhhhh." I told her after we got engaged that she only has two duties related to our wedding - make sure my brother doesn't embarass me (by doing/wearing something stupid at/to the wedding) and to know where we're registered in case people ask. I better send her a JCrew catalog to pick out an outfit for my brother.

Have I mentioned that our bridal party has been amazing? They've been so supportive, thoughtful and fun! I can't wait for my shower (a tea party) and bachelorette party (bowling, dinner and singing at a piano bar) this weekend! Brent is having his bachelor party on Saturday night, too. No strippers for either of us. Eeeewwww.....

So, in closing, I'm sorry about all the wedding-related talk, but that's all I got right now. I'll be on the lookout for better blogging fodder, I promise!

Maebe: Do you guys know where I could get one of those gold T-shaped pendants?
Michael: That's a cross.
Maebe: Across from where?
- Arrested Development

Friday, February 24, 2006

Drive-by Blogging

- I'm down 1.6 lbs. this week, according to Weight Watchers!
- I found what I'm wearing to next weekend's shower! Woo hoo!
- I'm digging the new Diet Coke Black Cherry Vanilla. I've never finished a Diet Coke in my life, but I may be able to finish this one.
- I'm also digging the Lean Cuisine paninis. Read some reviews of them here. The chicken, spinach, mushroom is my favorite so far.
- We're going to see our sample centerpieces on Sunday.
- I'm doing my free personal training session at my gym Tuesday night and will look into some training packages to do between now and the wedding.

"Bingo, man, bingo. 7-Minute Abs. And we guarantee just as good a workout as the 8-minute folks."- Hitchhiker, There's Something About Mary

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

RSVPimping Ain't Easy

Since we sent out our wedding invitations last week, every day has been like Christmas for me. I practically run to the mailbox, excited to receive more RSVPs. To date we have 33 people attending! (Only two "regrets.")

From the start of the returned RSVPs, we noticed a strange, but pleasantly surprising trend - people writing more than their names and whether or not they're accepting! It's included fun notes like "Congrats!" and "Love the invites!" and "We can't wait!" From now on, I will always write notes on the RSVPs!

An example of a sweet note:

We've also received some wacky notes:

And the one that got the biggest laugh from Brent and I:

That's from my future brother-in-law, who happens to be Brent's best man. We may have to hide the microphone from him. We can only imagine what his toast will be.

"Man, pimps got advice, too. Look, stop discriminating on the black man. In the immortal words of my cousin, Rudy Rambo III, from the East Side, there's three types of people in this world - people who make things happen, people who watch things happen, and people who get Pimp Slapped for not having Rudy Rambo's money on time." - Junior, Roll Bounce

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Someone Grant Me Immunity

The illness I mentioned in my last post? Well, I'm still feeling crappy. So much, in fact, that I was on my way to work this morning and about a mile away from my office, I turned around and drove home. I don't think I've ever been sick for four days.

I managed to suck it up and go to my wedding hair and make-up trial Sunday afternoon, mainly because it took forever to get the appointment because she's so popular. Despite my illness, she made me look fabulous. And I'm now officially a fan of false eyelashes!

I'm expecting (and hoping) to feel better tomorrow. Keeping up with my meds, rest and liquids. And I got a fun present in the mail today from justJENN, which always lifts my spirits! In response to my cupcake post where I mentioned I used a chopstick to check when my baked goods are done, she sent me a cake tester! It's even labeled "Cake tester!" (I got the green one.) It's the perfect excuse for some more baked goods....when my freakin' immune system is up for it.

" ...and the prince climbed up Rapunzel's hair to the top of the tower and said, 'Come with me, and we'll live happily ever after.' Then Rapunzel left her plastic bubble and died. The end." - Mrs. Livingston, Bubble Boy

Saturday, February 18, 2006

Ups & Downs

- Received pictures of my two flower girls in their dresses. I might as well show up in sweats because, believe me, these two little girls are going to steal the show.
- Decided to e-file my tax returns today and was pleasantly surprised to be receiving a refund large enough to pay for at least a couple of our wedding vendors. Brent will probably have a fatty return, too.
- My wedding hair and make-up trial is tomorrow!
- My bridal shower and bachelorette party are in a couple weeks and I'm BEYOND excited!
- 49 days till our wedding!

- Felt like crap all day today. Thought it was my allergies at first, but then had a funky, tingling feeling in my head that only accompanies a cold/flu. Slept for a couple hours tonight and am feeling a little better. But my face is raw from all the nose blowing, which doesn't bode well for my make-up trial tomorrow.
- I'm having a hard time deciding what to wear for my bridal shower. All I know is that it's a tea-theme. To my friends and family who were invited, the rest of the shower is a surprise, so don't accidentally reveal anything! :-)
- I've been hovering around a total 30 lbs. weight loss. I'd like to lose another 10 lbs., but I don't know if I can make that happen in the next 49 days. I'm switching from Weight Watchers' Core version of the plan, which didn't require counting, to the Flex version that requires I keep track of everything I eat. Hopefully that'll get me to my goal.
- Because I felt like crap today, I didn't make it to the gym for my typical hourlong Saturday workouts.
- We watched 21 Grams last night. That's two hours of our lives we'll never get back.

"Personally, I'm drawn to the symbolic journey of the roller coaster carrying you through life's ups and downs... till you puke." - Cadpig, 101 Dalmations: The Series

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Coffee Bean There, Done That

This morning at Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf...

Male barista (or is it baristo, like in Spanish?): "Can I have your name?"
Me: "Nanette."
Barista: "I like that name!"

I know he likes my name because he tells me EVERYTIME I GO THERE! I may start switching it up just to see what he says.

"Your name?" "Hilda." "I love that name!"

"Your name?" "Gertrude." "I love that name!"

"Your name?" "Open sore." "I love that name!"

"Your name?" "Syphillis." "I love that name!"

"Because you're worse than a traitor, Nina. You don't even have a cause, you don't believe in anything. But you would sell anyone and everything out to the highest bidder. So [throws table] [shouts] stop wasting my time. Gimme a name!" - Jack Bauer, 24

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Dish it up

What I overheard from the kitchen while Brent prepared a surprise dinner for us tonight:

"This is going to turn out delicious or we're going to In'N'Out. Either way we're going to have a yummy dinner."

"I think I'm going a little overboard."

"Will you still love me if this doesn't turn out ok?"

"This is a LOT of food!"

"Cooking is stressful."

"Where's the cookie sheet?" (I used it to take the cupcakes to work today...and left it there.)

"Oh, you gotta be kidding me??? I messed up on a step."

"Are you dying? I think this will be worth it!"

"We're getting close!"

"Does effort get me anything?...I'm serious!"

"The really hard thing is making it all come out at once."

"It's not my fault the oven sucks!"

"I get the feeling that this is going to be one of those times where we're going to look back and say, 'Remember when you did that stupid thing?' "

(noticing that I'm typing...) "Wait! Are you live blogging this??? You are, aren't you??? That's it! No food for you! .... STOP IT! ... I better get a good write-up afterward."

He indeed gets a fabulous write-up! He made grilled herb garlic shrimp, garlic mashed potatoes and served it with a side of corn salad from Whole Foods. He even added parsley! (His mom is the queen of garnish!)

Valentine's Dinner

He topped it off with a lemon tart from Whole Foods. Definitely fiance-of-the-year material!

"Happy is said to be the family which can eat onions together. They are, for the time being, separate, from the world, and have a harmony of aspiration." - Charles Dudley Warner

Monday, February 13, 2006

Thinking Inside The Box

Perhaps one of these days, maybe after we get the KitchenAid Mixer we registered for and after we get a larger kitchen, I'll make things from scratch ala justJENN and Hil. Until then I'll continue to be a lazy baker and make cupcakes from a box and frost them with pre-made frosting in a can. I'm so unprepared in the kitchen that we don't even have toothpicks to test how done the cupcakes are. I used a chopstick instead!

I made some Valentine-themed cupcakes to take to work tomorrow. They're the funfetti with whipped cream cheese frosting. I also added some fun red, white and pink heart quins, and conversation hearts.

Waiting to be decorated

Candy Cupcakes

Sweets for the Sweet

Be My Valentine Cupcake

"I really like Valentine’s Day in this office. It’s kind of like grade school, everybody gives out little presents and stuff. Like last year Jim gave me this card with Dwight’s head on it was horrifying and funny…" - Pam, The Office

Saturday, February 11, 2006

Are ya diggin' on me?

Things I'm Digging Right Now:

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- Dane Cook - Why it took me this long to discover him, I don't know. I liked him on SNL, even though I wasn't sure why he was hosting. I downloaded one of his comedy albums and a Comedy Central special to my iPod and I had to stop listening to it while I was on the plane and hanging out by the pool because I couldn't hold in my laughter. It also helps that he's cute in a Ryan Reynolds sort of way. He's got an HBO comedy special airing April 15 while we're on our honeymoon. (Yay for TiVo!)
- My new cherry skirt (from Target), even though I haven't worn it yet because I haven't decided if the pleats will make my arse look big.

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- My new bathing suits (The one shown is from Target, although I chose a plain black suit bottom. I got another suit from Victoria's Secret. Gotta start collecting suits for our Hawaiian honeymoon.)

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- My 1.6 lb weight loss this week, despite my eating frenzy in Florida
- Pink's new song "Stupid Girl" and the video for it, too. I appreciate a song that can pull off women-empowerment accompanied by laughter.
- James Blunt's guest appearance on this week's Love Monkey
- NBC's fabulously funny shows - Four Kings, The Office, Scrubs

Things I'm Not Feeling:
- The stupid post office won't issue their new 63-cent stamps, including the cute wedding ones that would have gone perfectly with our wedding colors, until March 1. I need to send out my invites on Monday, so I'll either have to use ugly stamps (one 60-cent and one 3-cent) or two First Class stamps. Bah!
- On my flight back from Florida I sat next to a guy from Atlanta who had nothing but crap to say about Los Angeles, even though I kept telling him, "L.A. isn't for everyone. I completely understand it." He just kept going on and on about how expensive everything is, how Beverly Hills isn't as nice as neighborhoods in Atlanta and how The Ivy is a hole-in-the-wall restaurant. Thank goodness I had my iPod to tune him out. That's what I get for trying to be friendly.
- The very-likely cancellation of Love Monkey. Why, oh, why do they cancel great shows? So not cool.
"When people refer to 'Back in the Day', it was a Wednesday. Just a little fun fact for ya. Take that home, chew on it. It's delicious." - Dane Cook

Friday, February 10, 2006

All The Small Things - A Pictorial

- Here's a rare photo of me with a drink. I don't drink as I don't like the taste of alcohol and drinking is expensive. However, with an open bar I'm sure I can find something I like. Here I'm holding a peach martini. Yum!

Drink up

- Brent and I went to the gym Wednesday night and found the smoke alarm going off. Some people were leaving the gym, but others were going in. We stood there for a second until we saw the smoke rising from the parking structure floor below us. I started heading for the car, while Brent said, "Let's go inside to see if they're still open." I grabbed his arm, laughing, and said, "I can't believe I have to try to convince you to walk away from a burning building!" He replied, laughing, "Well, where's there's smoke doesn't necessarily mean there's...." and he trailed off. As we left, we drove around and saw that there was something big on fire in the empty first floor of the parking structure attached to our gym.

- Last night we saw Lee Tergeson, whom you may know from HBO's Oz or perhaps as one of Wayne's friends in Wayne's World.

Apparently he'll be in some upcoming episodes of Desperate Housewives, which is a funny coincidence because last week in Bloomingdales I saw:

- And lastly, here's a recent pic of my nephew. My mom said she was cracking up because he refused to smile and insisted on pouting instead, very uncharacteristic of the happy baby he is. Doesn't he look like a cute little Cabbage Patch Kid?

"The drinking came after the driving ... and armed robbery ... but before the dancing and strip poker." - Helena Kyle, Birds of Prey

Monday, February 06, 2006

Suite Dreams

I made it safely to Florida. When I checked into the resort where we're staying, the manager whispered something to the girl checking me in, who in turn said, "We're going to upgrade you for free to a suite, which features a 5-foot balcony, a dining room, Murphy bed and living room!" I responded, "Sweet!" Once I got to the room, however, I got a little worried. The Murphy bed didn't look too comfortable. What I actually have is a meeting room with a bed in the wall. I figured that if the bed wasn't comfortable the first night, I'd switch rooms. Turns out that it was nice and comfy. So I have this fabulous room in a fabulous hotel.

And this is the view from one of my three balconies (yes, three balconies!):

This morning I attended some sessions to write coverage for my company's site. After I wrote my article, I had about four hours of down time before our cocktail hour, dinner and after-party. (Hard work, ya know.) I hung out by the pool with my iPod and napped for a while, then strolled along the dock. It couldn't have been a more gorgeous day - a nice 70 degrees.

Then I decided to burn off some of the yummy Super Bowl treats from last night, as well as the two little muffins I had at breakfast this morning (calories don't count when you're out of town, right?) with a workout in the spa's gym. The gym, albeit small, was really cool. The treadmills have TVs in them and there are towels soaked in ice water, which felt really nice.

I've spent a lot of time - last night and tonight - going up to complete strangers and introducing myself. The first couple times were uneasy, but then I got into my groove. Last night at the Super Bowl party I found people who were standing alone, went up to them and asked what they thought of the ads (this is an audience of marketers). Tonight I didn't have such a fabulous opening line, but I did ok. I did open one conversation by telling someone that they looked like Zach Braff and Adam Levine, the leader of Maroon 5. He didn't know what Adam looked like, but he seemed happy with the compliment. Tomorrow I'll have to introduce myself to the George Clooney-look alike, the Claire Danes twin, and the guy who looks just like the bomb squad guy on last night's Grey's Anatomy.

"Before we bring democracy to Iraq or even Afghanistan, it might be prudent to bring it to Florida. We don't have to bring regime change to the whole state. We can start in Pensacola and work our way down." - Jon Stewart, Daily Show

Saturday, February 04, 2006

I'm Just a Girl in the World

Sometimes it sucks being a girl. Most of the time it's pretty awesome, but other times, not so much. My recent example: packing for a 4-day business trip. You wouldn't think I'd need six pairs of shoes, but I do.

1. Workout shoes - I'd like to try to get a workout (or two) in while I'm there
2. Black high heels
3. Black not-so-high heels - in case #2 get uncomfortable
4. Flip-flops - for downtime and in case I find time to hang out in the spa/pool
5. Brown high heels - to go with my brown work outfits
6. Black pseudo-Converse - to wear on the plane. I think it'll be too cold to wear #4. I also need more casual shoes that are still appropriate to wear out with other business trip attendees

All these shoes + all the crap required to look decent + all the potential outfits (as I'm not exactly sure what occassions I'll have to dress for) = my bringing a whole lot of crap.

I am very excited about my trip, though. Tomorrow I'll be watching the Super Bowl with a group of people (online advertisers) who will likely be more excited about the commercials than the actual game - a very surreal experience, I'm sure. And this will be my first time to Florida. Best of all - we're staying at a fabulous 5-star resort! Hopefully I'll be able to squeeze in some down time to enjoy it. And if not, at least I'll be working hard in a lavish setting.

"Doing business without advertising is like winking at a girl in the dark. You know what you are doing, but nobody else does." - Stuart Henderson

Friday, February 03, 2006

I'd Like to Thank the Peanut Gallery

Thanks, everyone, for your fabulous feedback! It definitely helped! I've made my decision - due in part to all of your votes, but mostly because Brent plopped down on the couch next to me last night and said, out of nowhere, "I like #5." He actually had an opinion! I assumed he didn't, but it turns out he did.

My little flower girls will look fabulous in dress #5! That dress was also my favorite, but it was pretty close, hence the blog voting.

Thanks for helping me plan our wedding!

"Tyrone, you know how much I love watching you work. But I've got my country's 500th anniversary to plan, my wedding to arrange, my wife to murder, and Guilder to frame for it. I'm swamped." - The Prince Humperdink, Princess Bride

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Gonna Dress You Up In My Love

The mother of my flower girls e-mailed me tonight and said she can't decide which dress to buy for her daughters (ages 3 and 4). (I had sent her a bunch of links to give her an idea of what I liked and told her to choose whatever dress she liked best.) She asked her eldest daughter which dress she liked and she's insisting that they get one of each, so her vote isn't really helping. I've decided to see what you all think. So check out the choices below and tell me which one gets your vote (minus the headpieces). Perhaps your vote will convince me one way or the other.
Our wedding colors are pink and green, by the way, and these dresses are all in the same price range.
#1 - Plain but traditional and evergreen
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#2 - Pink and frilly
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#3 - Pink and frilly with fake rose petals in the bottom of the skirt
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#4 - White with pink and green flowers
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#5 - Green and frilly